Initially I intended this blog to be updated fairly often, at least once a week. It's funny how much time I don't have anymore.
Bilal is now three months (13 weeks) old and it's scary how fast it's gone by. He's changed to so much over this relatively short period of time. He started smiling a lot more a month or two ago, and even the odd proper hearty laugh (one of which I managed to catch on video). His little hands are becoming a lot more active now, waving around, flapping about and generally thumping anything in their way.
He's started settling down now as well, going much longer through the night without feeds, about 5-6hrs. We're starting to get used to taking him out, making sure everything is prepared, planning out routes in favour of feeding and nappy changing opportunities.
He's also outgrown his first batch of clothes now and will soon be filling up those 3-6month outfits. He outgrew the moses basket two months and the carry cot not long after (he's a long baby). It's so weird, I can't explain how all this makes me feel, he's just grown up so fast and before I know it he'll be starting school, let alone nursery when my wife goes back to work in March. It's all crazy.
Today for the first time I'll be leaving my son and wife for the first time since he was born for a substantial amount of time. OK, so it's only 4 days, but hey four days is a long time. I think it's going to be really difficult for me to leave today.
Monday, 7 September 2009
Thursday, 2 July 2009
Heat wave
So it's Summer and the heatwave is here. They say it comes every other year or so. It's 32C in our bedroom during the day so it's a baby-free zone; not even fans and open windows make a difference.
There's plenty of information out there about how to keep your baby cool during hot weather, but one thing I've realised is that it keeps changing and is sometimes conflicting. I find it quite confusing. My mum goes on about giving baby cooled boiled water, but we've been told not to by health staff, especially if you breastfeed.
It's strange how things change over time, what was normal then is classed as completely wrong now. Parents around 25+ years ago were told to give babies cooled boiled water, and now apparently it's wrong.
Why is this? I've been researching a little (not exhaustively) but can't seem to find any evidence related to this.
It's really difficult when you get conflicting information, doesn't make parenting any easier.
There's plenty of information out there about how to keep your baby cool during hot weather, but one thing I've realised is that it keeps changing and is sometimes conflicting. I find it quite confusing. My mum goes on about giving baby cooled boiled water, but we've been told not to by health staff, especially if you breastfeed.
It's strange how things change over time, what was normal then is classed as completely wrong now. Parents around 25+ years ago were told to give babies cooled boiled water, and now apparently it's wrong.
Why is this? I've been researching a little (not exhaustively) but can't seem to find any evidence related to this.
It's really difficult when you get conflicting information, doesn't make parenting any easier.
Friday, 19 June 2009
Monday, 15 June 2009
When the going gets tough....
...I start crying.
We all know raising a child is difficult, but until we actually go through it yourself. To simply say it's extremely exhausting just doesn't seem justify it; words can't really explain how difficult and testing a time it is, and this is coming from someone who's only had a week of it!
We've had trouble trying to sleep (as the previous post mentions), if he's not crying he's feeding. This is such a testing time for us especially for my wife, not only is she awake 23.5hrs a day either feeding or soothing him, she is also trying to recover from a major operation. All she can think of is how I will cope without sleep when I go back to work.
We all know raising a child is difficult, but until we actually go through it yourself. To simply say it's extremely exhausting just doesn't seem justify it; words can't really explain how difficult and testing a time it is, and this is coming from someone who's only had a week of it!
We've had trouble trying to sleep (as the previous post mentions), if he's not crying he's feeding. This is such a testing time for us especially for my wife, not only is she awake 23.5hrs a day either feeding or soothing him, she is also trying to recover from a major operation. All she can think of is how I will cope without sleep when I go back to work.
Monday, 8 June 2009
Resemblance
I keep asking myself how I feel. I still don't know. My sister mentioned that Bilal looks like my brother who passed away 24yrs ago. I asked my mum whether he did or not, she just looked at me in that way that I knew was a definite 'yes'. I think it hits a nerve when they see him. It certainly does with me, I just wish his uncle was here to see him.
Sunday, 7 June 2009
The Return of Bilal
Ok so it's Sunday morning, and I'm up relatively early(ish). I need to make sure the room is clear and sheets and blankets are on the cot and Moses basket; generally make it pleasant.
I'm not sure if all dad's get like this, but I'm starting to feel an overwhelming sense of responsibility and urge to make everything safe for Bilal. I purchased an anti-fungal/bacterial cleaning agent to clean out the air-con in the car. Also I feel this niggling urge to get the brakes checked on the car too. It's been raining non stop for two days now, and it's just started thundering, but I want to clean the car if i get time. I'm so silly.
I'm not sure if all dad's get like this, but I'm starting to feel an overwhelming sense of responsibility and urge to make everything safe for Bilal. I purchased an anti-fungal/bacterial cleaning agent to clean out the air-con in the car. Also I feel this niggling urge to get the brakes checked on the car too. It's been raining non stop for two days now, and it's just started thundering, but I want to clean the car if i get time. I'm so silly.
Friday, 5 June 2009
6lb 9oz, 09:25 5th June 2009
Wow, what can I say?
This has been one crazy ride over the past 24 hours. Last night we had to rush to the hospital to find out what was wrong with my wife and baby. We found out that baby had bowel movements whilst still inside (mecronium). This can be quite dangerous for baby as it can lead to infections.
After many tests and about 10hrs later my wife was rushed for an emergency c-section and a distressed baby was dragged out kicking and screaming at 09:25 this morning!
If there's one thing I can bring out of this is that I now have an even great respect for my wife. She extremely composed and calm even though what she was going through during all the testing and experiences leading up to the c-section was quite a bit more than 'very painful'.
The midwives and doctors throughout the three shifts that we were there said she was a model patient and were quite astonished with her composure and letting them get on with their jobs. In a large part I owe the safe arrival of our son to solely to my wife. Without her dedication, perseverance, strength and courage I fear today would have not have been the best day of my life.
I would also like to acknowledge the kind, considerate and caring teams at the Birmingham Womens Hospital that supported my wife during this experience. The midwives seemed to go above and beyond their roles and made the whole experience that much more bearable. The consultants supervising were also very caring and appreciative of my wifes composure.
I don't really think a simply thank you card and gift for the team would even come close to expressing my sincere appreciation.
I haven't even started to decipher the emotions going through me right now, and I don't know if I ever will be able to.
This has been one crazy ride over the past 24 hours. Last night we had to rush to the hospital to find out what was wrong with my wife and baby. We found out that baby had bowel movements whilst still inside (mecronium). This can be quite dangerous for baby as it can lead to infections.
After many tests and about 10hrs later my wife was rushed for an emergency c-section and a distressed baby was dragged out kicking and screaming at 09:25 this morning!
If there's one thing I can bring out of this is that I now have an even great respect for my wife. She extremely composed and calm even though what she was going through during all the testing and experiences leading up to the c-section was quite a bit more than 'very painful'.
The midwives and doctors throughout the three shifts that we were there said she was a model patient and were quite astonished with her composure and letting them get on with their jobs. In a large part I owe the safe arrival of our son to solely to my wife. Without her dedication, perseverance, strength and courage I fear today would have not have been the best day of my life.
I would also like to acknowledge the kind, considerate and caring teams at the Birmingham Womens Hospital that supported my wife during this experience. The midwives seemed to go above and beyond their roles and made the whole experience that much more bearable. The consultants supervising were also very caring and appreciative of my wifes composure.
I don't really think a simply thank you card and gift for the team would even come close to expressing my sincere appreciation.
I haven't even started to decipher the emotions going through me right now, and I don't know if I ever will be able to.
Thursday, 4 June 2009
Super Travel Thingy
When I was a kid I remember being pushed about in a 'push chair', a simple tubular metal framed McLaren thing with a blue and white hammock like seat cloth thing. I remember younger babies being carted around in a 'pram', which was essentially a big basket with a handle on four wheels.
We started looking around for prams in late 2008, was somewhat taken back ever so slightly by the enormous range of products on offer. I used to cart my brother around when he had his first and was looking for a pram of his own so I had some experience of it, but it's just not the same as looking for yourself.
I thought we'd go to a couple of shops, try a few out and then go order it offline for a cheaper price. Naively I thought all this would be done in a day, maybe two at the most. Such a headache, and with the advent of baby car seats over the past 10 or so years things have become ever more complicated. Let me explain...
These days prams are not called prams, they are 'travel systems'. Maybe this is something to do with the new digital age; everything has to be a system of some kind. Anyway, we looked at quite a few 'travel systems' over a couple of months. Things we considered when choosing:
Practicality looked at size, weight, storage areas for baby things as well as shopping bags. Most travel systems offered some form of under carriage storage with the main difference being capacity/load. Others felt as if they would be slightly unstable if a changing/travel bag was hung around the handles, while some offered storage for cups and snacks. One of the main things here was maneuverability which related to the size and weight of the travel system. I would say I'm over fairly average build, probably slightly stockier than some and 5'8" tall, while my wife is 5' and quite petite. What's comfortable for me, isn't for her.
Reputation is matter of opinion for most. Essentially though you can use to quickly judge which products to avoid and which may be of particular interest. As with most user reviews, it is common place to find negative opinions and less positive ones; people tend to make a bigger fuss about something if it doesn't work too well or have bad experiences. However, certain official reviewing sites/organisations like 'Which?' work towards making an unbiased review of a product and this can help set aside any doubts for a particular brand.
There's quite a lot of brands out there at the moment, companies that have been in business over 30 years and newer brands still in their infancy. Various brands have different selling points and generally cater to particular audiences. For example, Britax simply produces baby equipment such as prams and car seats and thus have a reputation for producing quality baby equipment for many years, as do McLaren. On the other hand you have newer brands such as... [I seem to have forgotten the names, let me go check] ... Bugaboo, oBaby and iCandy (Apple anyone?). Some are tailored for practicality and robustness, where others seem to be a fashion accessory for parents, with disk brakes, fancy tyres and alloy wheels.
In the end we went for a Britax Voyager Ultra that came with a carry cot, car seat and push chair. The car seat and carry cot can be used in conjuction with the push chair by laying the seat down flat and clicking either the car seat or carry cot into place. This is a bit of a beast of a pram and I feel slightly bad for suggesting it as I think my wife will find it quite difficult to push around. It's got a handy undercarriage load capable of carrying upto 7kg and it's sturdy enough to place a changing/travel bag on the handlebar. It's also got a little cup holder and a snack compartment on the handlebar.
Price was an important factor and once we'd decided on the Britax, we started looking around some more for better prices. Eventually we ordered ours from Mothercare for about 225 in sale. I think that particular model has now been replaced by a newer (lighter?) version. The main thing for us was that we felt our baby would be safe in it.
We started looking around for prams in late 2008, was somewhat taken back ever so slightly by the enormous range of products on offer. I used to cart my brother around when he had his first and was looking for a pram of his own so I had some experience of it, but it's just not the same as looking for yourself.
I thought we'd go to a couple of shops, try a few out and then go order it offline for a cheaper price. Naively I thought all this would be done in a day, maybe two at the most. Such a headache, and with the advent of baby car seats over the past 10 or so years things have become ever more complicated. Let me explain...
These days prams are not called prams, they are 'travel systems'. Maybe this is something to do with the new digital age; everything has to be a system of some kind. Anyway, we looked at quite a few 'travel systems' over a couple of months. Things we considered when choosing:
- sturdiness
- practicality
- reputation (good reviews)
- price
Practicality looked at size, weight, storage areas for baby things as well as shopping bags. Most travel systems offered some form of under carriage storage with the main difference being capacity/load. Others felt as if they would be slightly unstable if a changing/travel bag was hung around the handles, while some offered storage for cups and snacks. One of the main things here was maneuverability which related to the size and weight of the travel system. I would say I'm over fairly average build, probably slightly stockier than some and 5'8" tall, while my wife is 5' and quite petite. What's comfortable for me, isn't for her.
Reputation is matter of opinion for most. Essentially though you can use to quickly judge which products to avoid and which may be of particular interest. As with most user reviews, it is common place to find negative opinions and less positive ones; people tend to make a bigger fuss about something if it doesn't work too well or have bad experiences. However, certain official reviewing sites/organisations like 'Which?' work towards making an unbiased review of a product and this can help set aside any doubts for a particular brand.
There's quite a lot of brands out there at the moment, companies that have been in business over 30 years and newer brands still in their infancy. Various brands have different selling points and generally cater to particular audiences. For example, Britax simply produces baby equipment such as prams and car seats and thus have a reputation for producing quality baby equipment for many years, as do McLaren. On the other hand you have newer brands such as... [I seem to have forgotten the names, let me go check] ... Bugaboo, oBaby and iCandy (Apple anyone?). Some are tailored for practicality and robustness, where others seem to be a fashion accessory for parents, with disk brakes, fancy tyres and alloy wheels.
In the end we went for a Britax Voyager Ultra that came with a carry cot, car seat and push chair. The car seat and carry cot can be used in conjuction with the push chair by laying the seat down flat and clicking either the car seat or carry cot into place. This is a bit of a beast of a pram and I feel slightly bad for suggesting it as I think my wife will find it quite difficult to push around. It's got a handy undercarriage load capable of carrying upto 7kg and it's sturdy enough to place a changing/travel bag on the handlebar. It's also got a little cup holder and a snack compartment on the handlebar.
Price was an important factor and once we'd decided on the Britax, we started looking around some more for better prices. Eventually we ordered ours from Mothercare for about 225 in sale. I think that particular model has now been replaced by a newer (lighter?) version. The main thing for us was that we felt our baby would be safe in it.
Wasn't expecting this....
Right, it's 3:15 on Thursday afternoon, my wife has been feeling quite ill this morning, feverish, vomiting and severe backache for a few days.
Thing is, I was ill last week for the whole week with some form of flu which included vomiting and high fever. We just panicked and thought she'd caught something from me, but after a few casual phone calls to friends we've come to the conclusion that this is normal.
At the moment, she's laying in bed after having a quick walk to the shops and back.
I never knew it would be like this, I thought it would all just suddenly happen and she'd start having contractions. So at the moment I feel like I'm in a state of limbo just waiting for something else to happen, and while I'm waiting I'm trying to do my best to make her feel comfortable. It's actually quite scary not knowing what to expect. I've got five nieces, a few friends with children and have been to antenatal classes too, but it just doesn't prepare you at all.
Not for this bit anyway.
Thing is, I was ill last week for the whole week with some form of flu which included vomiting and high fever. We just panicked and thought she'd caught something from me, but after a few casual phone calls to friends we've come to the conclusion that this is normal.
At the moment, she's laying in bed after having a quick walk to the shops and back.
I never knew it would be like this, I thought it would all just suddenly happen and she'd start having contractions. So at the moment I feel like I'm in a state of limbo just waiting for something else to happen, and while I'm waiting I'm trying to do my best to make her feel comfortable. It's actually quite scary not knowing what to expect. I've got five nieces, a few friends with children and have been to antenatal classes too, but it just doesn't prepare you at all.
Not for this bit anyway.
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